We spoke with GlobalLove.com Director Jacki Hendy and asked her some questions, to give you some insight into her thoughts on love and relationships speaking from her own experience and perspective, that may provide some tips to assist you with dating, love and relationships while on your quest for true love.
Define love?
Love is a state of mind, rather than a feeling you have for another person. From my experience what is not love is fear. It is all about you, a journey within about letting go of fear. When we are fearless we are able to hold a much more loving state of mind and we are open to experience a loving connection with a partner or potential soul mate. If we can view love differently and newly, outside the conventional box, it will expand our horizons and offer new experiences.
Does true love still exist?
Yes true love does exist! It may not look the way you thought it would, but it does exist. The first myth we need to conquer is it is not likely to find true love in the conventional box we have placed it in. It is about getting real, closing the book on the fictional fairytale and writing a new auto-biography of your own!
Do you think there is a soul mate for everyone, or that we have more than one true love in our lifetime?
Yes, there is definitely a soul mate for everyone and often more than one true love in a lifetime. The trick is to be open to experience love again if a relationship ends. Soul mates are a wonderful part of life's journey and they are people who teach us about life and love along the way. They may not always be “The One" or the person we end up with but our lives are richer and we are better people for having known them. We can have soul mates for a reason, a season or a lifetime. The key is to not shut down on love or become fearful if you have been hurt by a relationship ending. Restore your trust in love, be fearless and you will find true love again. Remember true love is a state of mind. Be open to love and be loved and your soul mate will reveal themselves.
You have created Global Love an online dating agency. Does this mean you feel online dating is the way of the future?
It is definitely a wonderful vehicle for the present and the future. In our busy modern lives of technology, filled with family, work and friends our time and energy is precious. Having been a single mum, what I love most about online dating is that if it is used properly it is a great way to get to know people, screen and communicate with them, assess a level of compatibility before revealing your real name, phone number, address and choosing to meet. Online dating is fast, at GlobalLove we offer more options with refined results of like mind and compatibility immediately, as soon as you register. It can be done from the comfort of your own home in your P.J's and slippers if you like. For the price of two coffees per week it gives you more options, some good fun and you don't have to waste time, money and energy meeting people face to face only to find there is nothing there. It doesn't replace chemistry but it is a great tool to give you more options and it can help refine your search so you can be sure the people you choose to meet have similar standards and values and then if the sparks fly you know there is already a foundation in place to give the relationship a better chance of lasting.
What is the first thing that attracts you to a partner?
It is their energy and their presence. It is the x factor that no one or nothing can measure or define. It does include physical attraction but is so much more than that. It is like ESP kicks in and an instant connection is felt. It is like in the movie and book, "The Secret" we all give off a vibe and it is simply called "The Law of Attraction", like attracts like, so whether we are conscious of it or not the 'universe' is in action drawing people to us according to the way we think, act and speak to help us wake up and grow, and as Sir Isaac Newton said "For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction"...aka Karma!...so be careful what you wish for!
If you have love, you are invincible – true or false...
That is a broad statement and depends on the context is which love and invincible are defined. My answer is TRUE - defining love in its purest most cosmic sense. If true love is a fearless state of mind then we are invincible!
What are the features/characteristics we should look for that are important in finding a compatible life partner?
The chemistry, spark, x factor and physical are all important and even if they fade away at times can always be rekindled with effort. What is more important to be life partners though is to have common standards and values. It doesn't matter how strong the connection is if after time you discover you have different morals or attitudes and behaviours. The relationship is sure to fail unless one or both partners is willing to change and grow. We cannot enforce change on another person so sometimes love means saying "I love you but I love myself more and am not willing to live this way." Both people in a partnership always have choices. They can choose to grow together or apart, but rest assured the same issues will become apparent in their next relationship. The funny thing about life is that, whether we like it or not, it is all about love and relationships and if we don't get our lessons the first time round they will come back to haunt us again! And continue to do so in more magnified ways until we get the wakeup call!
Do you think there is a soul mate for everyone?
Yes, there is definitely a soul mate for everyone and often more than one true love in a lifetime. The trick is to be open to experience love again if a relationship ends. Soul mates are a wonderful part of life's journey and they are people who teach us about life and love along the way. They may not always be “The One" or the person we end up with but our lives are richer and we are better people for having known them. We can have soul mates for a reason, a season or a lifetime. The key is to not shut down on love or become fearful if you have been hurt by a relationship ending. Restore your trust in love, be fearless and you will find true love again. Remember true love is a state of mind. Be open to love and be loved and your soul mate will reveal them.
What is the silliest thing you've seen someone do for love (or when they are in love)? Single handedly destroy it! Too often we are our own worst enemy when it comes to love. I see many relationships go downhill after the "Honeymoon" period or after a challenge of some kind that causes the flame of true love to flicker and our egos (fears, doubts and insecurities) seize the opportunity to engulf and extinguish it reducing it to glowing embers. This is when old patterns of behaviour can return and we suddenly choose to see the worst in our partner rather than the best. The cup goes from half full to half empty and our 'dark side' raises its ugly head! This can be the beginning of the end.
Human behaviour can be insane & sabotaging when it comes to love. The insanity is that we seem more intent on being right and destructive, by making the other person bad and wrong, than choosing love and happiness. Do we want to be right or happy? The silliness is that most people choose to be right instead of happy and the relationship either becomes a daily war zone or ends. Why does it seem so difficult to stay in love? If only we could get out of our own way! Well the truth is we can. The love we experience when we fall in love is what is real, and the rest of the garbage isn't (although it requires management!). The flame may flicker from time to time but even glowing embers can restart a fire. Love can always be restored, it is a choice. We just have to be conscious of where we focus our thoughts and energy...cup half full or half empty? Invest in love & you will have it.
What is an essential ingredient you think is important in a relationship and why?
The secret recipe is different for every couple and I think is identified by a mixture of individual values and what past experience has taught us and so people look for and place meaning on different qualities. Sometimes it is easier to know what you don't want because of something that was lacking in a previous relationship. My secret recipe is a solid base blended with trust, friendship and commitment. Followed by a layer of honest and open communication, topped with lots of love and affection. Baked in a good looking mould until it is golden brown! I think it is a combo of all these ingredients for a healthy lasting relationship. To pick one is hard but trust is vital and I think it allows people to be more stable and secure within themselves which provides a solid foundation for them to be the best person they can be in a relationship and then the rest can grow from there....
How do you know when it's true love (the real thing)?
Ah...It is a full moon, all the stars are aligned, time stands still, you are levitating, entranced, fixed in each others gaze and can see the stardust spiralling around you! Well kind of! Some people really do have an experience that transcends time and space, an instant recognition that is beyond words and a knowing that you have met your other half. (No illegal substances required!) When you know you know, it is like ESP kicks in when two like souls magnetise each other in divine timing to learn, love and grow... When I say this I am not referring to lust. What I am describing is something very different and when you have had the experience you will know and be able to make the distinction between true love and lust. And you really know it is true love when they have seen your 'darkside', know you at your worst and still stick around loving you because the worst in you is outweighed by your best !
Define love?
Love is a state of mind, rather than a feeling you have for another person. From my experience what is not love is fear. It is all about you, a journey within about letting go of fear. When we are fearless we are able to hold a much more loving state of mind and we are open to experience a loving connection with a partner or potential soul mate. If we can view love differently and newly, outside the conventional box, it will expand our horizons and offer new experiences.
Does true love still exist?
Yes true love does exist! It may not look the way you thought it would, but it does exist. The first myth we need to conquer is it is not likely to find true love in the conventional box we have placed it in. It is about getting real, closing the book on the fictional fairytale and writing a new auto-biography of your own!
Do you think there is a soul mate for everyone, or that we have more than one true love in our lifetime?
Yes, there is definitely a soul mate for everyone and often more than one true love in a lifetime. The trick is to be open to experience love again if a relationship ends. Soul mates are a wonderful part of life's journey and they are people who teach us about life and love along the way. They may not always be “The One" or the person we end up with but our lives are richer and we are better people for having known them. We can have soul mates for a reason, a season or a lifetime. The key is to not shut down on love or become fearful if you have been hurt by a relationship ending. Restore your trust in love, be fearless and you will find true love again. Remember true love is a state of mind. Be open to love and be loved and your soul mate will reveal themselves.
You have created Global Love an online dating agency. Does this mean you feel online dating is the way of the future?
It is definitely a wonderful vehicle for the present and the future. In our busy modern lives of technology, filled with family, work and friends our time and energy is precious. Having been a single mum, what I love most about online dating is that if it is used properly it is a great way to get to know people, screen and communicate with them, assess a level of compatibility before revealing your real name, phone number, address and choosing to meet. Online dating is fast, at GlobalLove we offer more options with refined results of like mind and compatibility immediately, as soon as you register. It can be done from the comfort of your own home in your P.J's and slippers if you like. For the price of two coffees per week it gives you more options, some good fun and you don't have to waste time, money and energy meeting people face to face only to find there is nothing there. It doesn't replace chemistry but it is a great tool to give you more options and it can help refine your search so you can be sure the people you choose to meet have similar standards and values and then if the sparks fly you know there is already a foundation in place to give the relationship a better chance of lasting.
What is the first thing that attracts you to a partner?
It is their energy and their presence. It is the x factor that no one or nothing can measure or define. It does include physical attraction but is so much more than that. It is like ESP kicks in and an instant connection is felt. It is like in the movie and book, "The Secret" we all give off a vibe and it is simply called "The Law of Attraction", like attracts like, so whether we are conscious of it or not the 'universe' is in action drawing people to us according to the way we think, act and speak to help us wake up and grow, and as Sir Isaac Newton said "For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction"...aka Karma!...so be careful what you wish for!
If you have love, you are invincible – true or false...
That is a broad statement and depends on the context is which love and invincible are defined. My answer is TRUE - defining love in its purest most cosmic sense. If true love is a fearless state of mind then we are invincible!
What are the features/characteristics we should look for that are important in finding a compatible life partner?
The chemistry, spark, x factor and physical are all important and even if they fade away at times can always be rekindled with effort. What is more important to be life partners though is to have common standards and values. It doesn't matter how strong the connection is if after time you discover you have different morals or attitudes and behaviours. The relationship is sure to fail unless one or both partners is willing to change and grow. We cannot enforce change on another person so sometimes love means saying "I love you but I love myself more and am not willing to live this way." Both people in a partnership always have choices. They can choose to grow together or apart, but rest assured the same issues will become apparent in their next relationship. The funny thing about life is that, whether we like it or not, it is all about love and relationships and if we don't get our lessons the first time round they will come back to haunt us again! And continue to do so in more magnified ways until we get the wakeup call!
Do you think there is a soul mate for everyone?
Yes, there is definitely a soul mate for everyone and often more than one true love in a lifetime. The trick is to be open to experience love again if a relationship ends. Soul mates are a wonderful part of life's journey and they are people who teach us about life and love along the way. They may not always be “The One" or the person we end up with but our lives are richer and we are better people for having known them. We can have soul mates for a reason, a season or a lifetime. The key is to not shut down on love or become fearful if you have been hurt by a relationship ending. Restore your trust in love, be fearless and you will find true love again. Remember true love is a state of mind. Be open to love and be loved and your soul mate will reveal them.
What is the silliest thing you've seen someone do for love (or when they are in love)? Single handedly destroy it! Too often we are our own worst enemy when it comes to love. I see many relationships go downhill after the "Honeymoon" period or after a challenge of some kind that causes the flame of true love to flicker and our egos (fears, doubts and insecurities) seize the opportunity to engulf and extinguish it reducing it to glowing embers. This is when old patterns of behaviour can return and we suddenly choose to see the worst in our partner rather than the best. The cup goes from half full to half empty and our 'dark side' raises its ugly head! This can be the beginning of the end.
Human behaviour can be insane & sabotaging when it comes to love. The insanity is that we seem more intent on being right and destructive, by making the other person bad and wrong, than choosing love and happiness. Do we want to be right or happy? The silliness is that most people choose to be right instead of happy and the relationship either becomes a daily war zone or ends. Why does it seem so difficult to stay in love? If only we could get out of our own way! Well the truth is we can. The love we experience when we fall in love is what is real, and the rest of the garbage isn't (although it requires management!). The flame may flicker from time to time but even glowing embers can restart a fire. Love can always be restored, it is a choice. We just have to be conscious of where we focus our thoughts and energy...cup half full or half empty? Invest in love & you will have it.
What is an essential ingredient you think is important in a relationship and why?
The secret recipe is different for every couple and I think is identified by a mixture of individual values and what past experience has taught us and so people look for and place meaning on different qualities. Sometimes it is easier to know what you don't want because of something that was lacking in a previous relationship. My secret recipe is a solid base blended with trust, friendship and commitment. Followed by a layer of honest and open communication, topped with lots of love and affection. Baked in a good looking mould until it is golden brown! I think it is a combo of all these ingredients for a healthy lasting relationship. To pick one is hard but trust is vital and I think it allows people to be more stable and secure within themselves which provides a solid foundation for them to be the best person they can be in a relationship and then the rest can grow from there....
How do you know when it's true love (the real thing)?
Ah...It is a full moon, all the stars are aligned, time stands still, you are levitating, entranced, fixed in each others gaze and can see the stardust spiralling around you! Well kind of! Some people really do have an experience that transcends time and space, an instant recognition that is beyond words and a knowing that you have met your other half. (No illegal substances required!) When you know you know, it is like ESP kicks in when two like souls magnetise each other in divine timing to learn, love and grow... When I say this I am not referring to lust. What I am describing is something very different and when you have had the experience you will know and be able to make the distinction between true love and lust. And you really know it is true love when they have seen your 'darkside', know you at your worst and still stick around loving you because the worst in you is outweighed by your best !
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